Week 1: Reflective Blog Post: My Journey with English – As a Language, Subject, and Identity

     There are times when English feels empowering. This is when I work hard and pass an essay with flying colors, when I see my grammar and vocabulary improving, or when I can express my thoughts fluently. It can be empowering when I am able to be the bridge between older generations (who know mostly Chuukese) and the new generations (who know mostly English). Other times, English also feels limiting. I feel that the more I focus on improving my English, the more I feel like I’m neglecting my native Chuukese.      Now I don’t even have a choice at home because English is the only language my husband and I understand. I notice myself losing Chuukese vocabulary, even though I haven’t fully mastered English yet. Another challenge is that some words don’t translate perfectly between the two languages, especially when speaking to someone who only knows one.      The only time I feel I can truly communicate my thoughts fully is when I talk to some...

  Knowing how to speak, write, and read English has helped me and others that I care about in so many ways. During my time here in Hawaii, I was able to help my elderly aunties and uncles who do not speak, write, or read English with medical appointments, or being their translators when they needed it at common places like stores, filling out applications, or making big purchases. English also helped my love life. Even though my husband and I are both Micronesians, we speak completely different languages. The common language that we both speak is English. I don't think we would’ve been able to connect the way we did if none of us understood or spoke English. The most obvious way that English has improved my life is through my academics and career. I wouldn’t have come a long way if I hadn’t taken the chance to learn the language. 

  The English I spoke growing up at home was mostly a mix of Chuukese, my native language, and English with a Guam/Chamorro accent. I adopted the accent from my cousins who lived in Guam that visited from time to time. Mixing the two was mainly because our vocabularies in both languages were limited, and it naturally became the way that we communicate with each other.  When I moved to Hawaii, it was almost the same thing, the only difference is, I had more cousins that speak with the Hawaiian pidgin accent than with the Guam/Chamorro accent. Without even realizing, the way I speak at home gradually changed and my accent just sounds funny to others because it is now a mix of Chuukese, Chamorro, and Hawaiian Pidgin. At schools, we are encouraged to speak and write in proper English, and besides the accent/sound and slang, I think the main difference is in the grammar.

     I was able to understand some simple English words through television as a kid, and my English-speaking cousins who would come down for Christmas and New Years or Summer vacation. I started to learn how to read and write in English at Seventh Day Adventist in Chuuk, Micronesia, where I finished kindergarten to 4th grade. I remember one of the policies was not to speak any other language besides English. Knowing this, my parents started to encourage us to speak English even at home to practice and to be able to stay on track in school especially with everything being in English. This helped me a lot as I was able to keep up and do well with my schoolwork. After watching the movie Matilda, I wanted to have superpowers like her, so I started reading books. I remember it was so hard to focus at first, especially when it comes to books without pictures. The first English book that I still remember reading as a kid was Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone by JK Rowling. T...